Comments on: What is the best way to address wedding invitations, when there is no inner envelop?

By: elsie

elsie — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 17:33:59 +0000

Why not go to Wal-Mart and buy some additional envelopes so you can have both?

I used a DIY kit that only came with one set of envelopes. I used those as inners since they were so pretty. I bought large white envelopes (about $5 for 50 envelopes) and used them as outers. This worked perfectly and made my invites look much more professional. It was really inexpensive as well!

This way you won’t have to worry about the "and guest" "and family" or other naming issues.

Also, I’d recommend addressing it as Mr. and Mrs. John Smith on the outer. Mary is your friend, but traditionally you use the man’s name. Then the inside envelope will read:

Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Child 1 and Child 2

This way you have spelled out exactly who is invited, so hopefully no mystery guests will be RSVP’d! Good luck!
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Just sent out my invites today!

By: Mari N

Mari N — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 17:07:59 +0000

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Family is best -- go formal.
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By: calimami

calimami — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:40:59 +0000

Don’t stress too much on the "proper" way to do it. Just make sure that it clearly indicates who is invited. You usually use the inner envelope to list out the specific invitees, so be specific on your outer envelopes so you don’t have a bunch of unexpected guests.

If the spouse is also invited (which is typical if you are inviting married guests) you could use Mr and Mrs John Smith, Mr and Mrs Smith, or John and Mary Smith. Mary won’t be offended if her husbands name is listed first. It’s her husband anyways.

If you are specifically closer to Mary (and not John) and she has a family, I think Mrs Mary Smith and family is ok. But you could also write The Smith Family or Mr and Mrs John Smith and family.

Good luck!
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By: SE

SE — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:28:59 +0000

Just put both of their their names: John and Mary Smith. or: Family of John and Mary Smith
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By: maigen_obx

maigen_obx — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:45:59 +0000

This dilemma is why there are two envelopes. You would still put Mr. and Mrs. John Smith on the envelope, regardless of who is your friend. Add and family if you are inviting the whole family. However, be advised that doing so can open you up to getting way more people invited to your wedding than you may have bargained for. My cousin did that and ONE response card came back with 36 people coming. You might want to reconsider the inner envelope as a way to control your guest list.
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By: travel_girl

travel_girl — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:32:59 +0000

That's exactly what I did on my invitations. I put the names of both people on the envelope, for example, Mary and John Smith, and then if there was also children, I just added "and family" to it. For my single friends, I even put "Mary Smith and Guest" on the outer envelope. Keep in mind that it all depends on your guests and how fussy they are about those types of things. I knew that my guests were all fairly laid-back and not the types to get their knickers in a twist over how an invitation was addressed, but there are those out there who take these things very seriously. You just have to know your audience.
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By: Lydia

Lydia — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:50:59 +0000

Mr. John and Mrs. Mary Smith and family.
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By: Kellie L

Kellie L — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:34:59 +0000

Always use the husbands name. Doesn't matter if she is your friend or he is, they are one.
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By: Love not hate

Love not hate — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:58:59 +0000

i don't know. But on mine they put Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
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